Day 1

I'll start out by confessing that I got homesick two hours into the flight, and that I'm missing home like crazy right now. It's not just people, but also the familiarity and security of home.

The following is a long sob story of how homesick I felt from Saturday night (SG time) up til now, Sunday night (SG time). Read at your own risk.

There were multiple points of realisation at which I went 'shit is getting real'. First was when I lost sight of all through the glass, after I'd waved my last wave. I turned towards the gate and felt utterly alone. As I boarded the aircraft I felt like a small silly girl playing pretend. And when I turned off my phone -- losing connectivity is terrible. The plane lifted off, and I turned my watch back 7 hours, saw the man next to me do the same, and somehow felt okay.

Then I started to watch Frozen, a movie I'd wanted to watch with my cell group but hadn't had the time to. I was back to feeling sad, and as I watched I knew that partly it was to distract from that. The movie ended, and I was back to it, feeling more sad than ever.

(By the way I really liked the movie. I like how they purposely overturned the assumption that an act of true love must always be a kiss. And the female leads were cool, songs were awesome, Kristoff adorable. Although of course since it's a kid's movie, some things weren't as fleshed out as they could have been.)

After that was Red 2 and Ender's Game, with a 6 hour on-off sleep in the middle of Red 2. I didn't get to finish Ender's game But I felt okay and excited to get to Hamburg.

After various airport things I was at Frankfurt Fernbahnhof waiting for my 0842 train to Hamburg. I spent a little while trying to figure out how my new SIM card works but gave up cos all German and a useless website link. (I still havent installed it. Relying on wifi) But basically on whatsapp telling everyone how safely I landed haha. And on the train I watched the beautiful scenery fly by at 196kph for most of the time, slept the rest of the time. Attempted to check in, attempted to go to the bank, bla bla bla and here I am on my bed skyping E, figuring out where to go and when. Buying tickets. Me lamenting about homesickness and she telling me to be a woman, hear me roar. Haha.

I'm just gonna say, at the end of this long sob story, that it's gonna be alright. I may be in a foreign place alone, but God's with me, I won't be afraid, and there are things to do and see. I'm gonna make the most of this. (:

I think as we age, we simultaneously become more alone and more connected. Or maybe a better way to put it is that we become more independent, but we also choose to depend on a few people. And the hard part is finding the balance between that.